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  • Writer's pictureRita Benkhalti

FINDING THE CONFIDENCE TO MAKE THINGS HAPPEN

Updated: Apr 17, 2021



Remember when you were a baby and learned how to speak? Of course not! We don't remember saying our first words, and yet, today you and I can speak and read English, and maybe one or two more languages. Continue reading to know how this idea can help you gain the confidence to accomplish all your goals.

When we started uttering our first syllables, we were not concerned with sentence

structure, grammar, genders, plurals, verb tenses and synonyms. We simply started to articulate the sounds that our brain picked up from our surroundings. Gradually, over time, through exposure to the language and trial and error, we developed our vocabulary and our speech structure. What enabled our fluency was our constant experimentation with our voices and articulation. We learned how to speak without knowing in advance all the rules, all the words, and all the intricacies of the English language.

I apply this same process to my business and to any project I want to take on.

One of my favourite business coaches, Marie Forleo, brilliantly coined the phrase: "Clarity comes from engagement, not thought."

When we want to start a new project, for example a business, we often don't know how to start because we are conscious of the fact that there are many things we have yet to figure out. There are so many things we don't know how to do. We sit on our couches with a notebook, trying to figure out a business strategy, we spend hours online reading about our projects, looking at others who have done it before, and searching through Youtube videos for tips. We enroll in courses online, we order books from Amazon, we join groups related to our passion...we do all these activities to feel ready. However, the more we learn, and the more we think about it, the less confident we feel. We come to the realization that there is always going to be one more thing we don't know about. This is pretty scary, and, at best, makes us postpone our start date indefinitely, or, at worst, makes us abandon our goals altogether.

If you identify with the above, I am here to tell you that this is a perfectly normal feeling, but it is also a totally false claim triggered by your inner fear, and you must get rid of it if you ever want to accomplish your own project or business.


As a baby, you did not wait until you knew how to properly speak before expressing yourself to the rest of the world. You simply started with what you could immediately pronounce (sort of), and trusted that along the way you would perfect your speaking skills and enlarge your knowledge of the language. I invite you to apply this same logic to any project you want to begin. There is no point in staying still, and not doing anything until you finish all the courses, videos, trainings, books, podcasts, and conferences BEFORE starting.

I guarantee you: at that rate, you won't get anything done, ever, because there will always be one more thing to learn, one more skill to master, one more software to update, one more gadget to purchase.


You need to trust that, as you actually START executing on your project, your brain will naturally evolve. It will encounter obstacles but also have access to new resources to figure out how to overcome these obstacles.

Engaging in your new project will spark new ideas that you would not have previously had if it weren't for having gone through the actual experience in real life, in real time, with your own flesh and bones. And in this manner, step by step, you will illuminate the path ahead. Your mind will feel enlarged and inspired with new creative ideas and solutions. You will gain clarity. You will probably reach conclusions and make changes to your original project that you would have never been able to conceive by simply "thinking" or "learning" about what you have to do. This new acquired knowledge and clarity will only come from you actually doing stuff and by engaging in your project. And let me add a priceless piece of good news: on top of getting clarity, you will gain CONFIDENCE.


If I had to rephrase Marie's quote, I would say:

"Confidence comes from engagement, not thought."

Because you can't think your way through confidence.


You have to actually do things that challenge you and as you will resolve these challenges, you will feel confident about your ability to take on bigger projects in life.

The next time you feel like there are just too many things to figure out and learn before starting your project, I encourage you to take a breath, close your eyes, and imagine yourself as a baby starting to spit out whatever words you thought meant you were speaking a language. This attitude took you all the way to where you are today: a perfectly fluent orator. Use that same attitude towards your project to MAKE THINGS HAPPEN!

Read out loud: I GOT THIS



The Make Things Happen blog is published every Sunday. Make sure to come back next week for more advice on how to be successful in your business by developing the right mindset, skills, and tool kit!


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